At over six feet tall, complemented by a sculpted physique, confident gait and a smile that screams spontaneity, Abel Kai is accustomed to turning heads wherever he goes.
It's when he speaks that Abel's vulnerability kicks in, preventing him from articulating thoughts trapped in a heavy stammer.
Abel's celebrity status – he is a sought-after fashion model in Kenya – has turned him into an ambassador for increased awareness and acceptance of stammering as a speech disability.
"In primary school, I was asked to read a paragraph aloud. I struggled to get the words out," Abel, born in the highlands just outside Nairobi in 1996, tells TRT Afrika.
"My stammer worsened after that experience, and the sense of frustration left me overwhelmed. I stammered so much that I eventually broke down in tears."
Stammering, also known as stuttering, is a speech disorder that affects fluency, causing interruptions in the flow of speech. These interruptions may take the form of repetitions, prolongations or blocks where a person struggles to produce certain sounds or words.
For Abel, then a young child looking to fit in, reconciling to his persistent stammer felt like a punch in the gut every time he tried to speak.
The worst part was the look on his friends' faces whenever they heard his stammer.
"My classmates even distanced themselves from me, believing my stammer was contagious. I wanted to defend myself, to explain that it wasn't an infection they could catch, but every attempt to speak only made me stammer more," recalls Abel.
Multiple triggers
While the exact cause of stammering remains unclear, it is believed to result from genetic, neurological and environmental factors.
The medical condition still baffles health experts, as there is still no explanation on how to treat it, although speech therapy is known to help manage the condition in the long run.
There are also instances of persistent stammering going away on its own after the person reaches a certain age.
Abel believes ignorance about the condition is part of the problem. He says people notice a stammer but rarely understand the emotional weight that comes with it.
This visually impaired lawmaker inspires people living with disability to turn their scars into success stories.
"Stammering is like an iceberg – you only see the small portion above the surface, while the larger, more complex struggles remain hidden beneath. Beyond the visible speech difficulty lies a world of self-doubt, stigma and shattered confidence," he explains.
So, does being a known face representing fashion brands and designers help subsume the unwanted attention his stammer gets?
"As I grew older, I realised that my stammer was not something I could wish away – it was a part of me, instead of resisting it. I chose to embrace it," Abel tells TRT Afrika.
"This acceptance wasn't easy, but it taught me resilience and self-awareness. I learned to navigate different social situations, preparing myself mentally for conversations and developing strategies to stay composed."
Low self-esteem
Beyond the physical aspect, stammering can impact a person's self-esteem and social interactions.
This is despite scientific confirmation that contrary to common misconceptions, stammering is not linked to intelligence or nervousness.
"The frustration of struggling to say my name, the humiliation of being mocked when I was in school, and the constant fear of speaking in public have been my silent battles. But I didn't let that define me. I graduated top of my class and built a career in fashion," says Abel.
The Kenyan model points out that the primary challenge is managing the emotional toll stammering takes.
"Anger and anxiety make the condition worse," says Abel. "When I am nervous or frustrated, my stammer escalates, making communication even more difficult. Over time, I have trained myself to remain calm even in difficult situations because my reaction influences the conversation and how people perceive me," he says.
Compared to two decades ago, many more people are aware today of the emotional suffering someone faces when they are taunted for stammering. Abel says he keeps fighting through activism and sensitisation to get more people on board.
"I still encounter hostility and impatience from people who fail to understand my struggle. There have been moments when I have felt invisible, silenced not just by my speech but by the judgment of others," he says.
"So, instead of being bitter, I choose to educate. I choose to be patient. And most importantly, I choose to define myself beyond my stammer."
